This is a list of quotes used by Rufus.
- "You fought the rest, now try the best!"
- "I'll defeat everyone on the planet!"
- "Whoa, I'm sweating here."
- "You get enough meat in your diet?"
- "Try blocking!"
- "I don't need an apprentice."
- "Go ahead and hit me!"
- "Find your Zen."
- "What are you No. 1 at?"
- "I'm so cool."
- "Fighting me is the highlight of your life."
Rufus: They say this joker Ken Masters is the best fighter in America!? The best fighter in America, an' not to mention the best lookin', is yours truly, Rufus! Yeah that's right, I'm the best. Period."
Candy: "Hey, Rufus. What if you totally beat the crap outta that Ken dude on TV or something? Then everyone will know for sure who the best really is... Right baby? Right?"
Rufus: "You are a genius, Candy! I know I made you my girl for a reason, honeypants! I guess we know where we're headed next! Get ready, Ken Masters! Your days are numbered!"
Rufus: "Ha! Looks like I finally caught up to you, blondie! You gave me quite the runaround! The fat lady's about to sing, ain't she?"
Ken: "Wha...? Who the heck are you?"
Rufus: "Why, you little... That's it! Every time, man. Every time...! Well, ha! I'm sick of this treatment!"
Ken: "Alright, man. I get it. You wanna fight me. Is that it? Cool. I was just looking for an opponent anyway."
Rufus: "Why, you!!! I'll pulverize ya! I'll cut you up! Then I'll put you back together and do it again!"
Ken: *crosses his arms and shakes his head*
Rufus: "You losers!"
Ken: "Need a tow there, friend?"
Rufus: "I don't need no tow! This is all part of my training!"
Ken: "Really? Well whatever... See ya!"
Candy: "Seriously, baby, why don't I just help you push? That'd be faster than this."
Rufus: "Don't you move! Like I said, I'm training here! This is all your fault! KEN MASTEEEERS!"
- "Oh crap!"
- "When I was a kid, I used to go to the movies all the time. I totally dug all the kung-fu action flicks. I mean, I was practically obsessed! So I started taking all these martial arts correspondence courses. Then, I rode my hog all around China, picking up skills!"
- "So I'm, like, a legend in the biker world. Or more like a god. But I ain't satisfied with that status. This time, I wanna be a god in the fighting world, ya know? Like, on a worldwide basis! People tell me I should be satisfied with "best in America," but..."
- "The way I see it, bein' a biker is, like, a total lifestyle choice. I mean, you pick a bike and you customize it and all that. It's a real commitment, ya know? And the best part is, you can go pretty much anywhere on a bike. Everywhere but the ocean, that is."
- "I don't actually remember the dude's name, but there was this one guy, and he was, like, the greatest fighter in the USA or whatever. So, I don't actually know much about him or whatever, but I'm pretty sure I could take him in a fight 'cuz I'm one tough cookie!"
- "I've got a great body, don't I? My girlfriend is all, like, "It bounces around like a waterbed!" She's a real freaky chick, man. But don't get me wrong, OK? I spend plenty of time with my dude friend, too. I mean, bros before hos, right? Am I right? So, anyway..."
- "I consider myself to be a pretty modest guy, really. People don't always see me that way, but that's totally who I am. Like, I'm not necessarily the greatest fighter out there yet, but I don't let it get to me, ya know? I mean, there's a lotta dudes out there..."
- "So, I'm totally dating this chick named Candy, right? And, lemme tell ya, man, she's just about as sweet as candy, too! Know what I'm sayin'? The name suits her well, man. At first, I was, like, "Is this some kinda stripper stage name, or what?" Guess I was wrong..."
- "So, you've got a significant other, or what? I do! And she's, like, totally hot, man! Just smokin'! I mean, we fight once in a while just like any couple, but it's all good. She sure is aggressive, though. One time, she totally started throwin' stuff around, man!"
- "Anyway, things are gettin' pretty serious with me and Candy, right? Like, she totally talks about gettin' married and whatnot. I'm cool with all that an' all, but I'm not so big on fancy ceremonies and stuff, right? I mean, it's not like I stockpile tuxedos or..."
- "My old lady, Candy? She's not just about good looks, man. No way. She's got an awesome personality, too. The two of us are, like, the world's most perfect couple, ya know? We both suck at math, so we can borrow each other's hands if we have to count past 10."
- "I've got this rad pool back at my pod, and not one of these kidney-shaped thingamabobs, no way! Mine is, like, totally original and just oozing with style and class! Check this out, man... It's shaped like a freakin' dollar bill! Is that the greatest? Isn't it?"
- "Now you know how it feels to lose, Ken Masters! What's that? You say I got the wrong guy? No way, man! I ain't stupid! You got the blonde hair, the gloves... Maybe you changed your pants or whatever, but still! I know Ken Masters when I see him! Yeah!"
- "Phew! That was tough! I kinda knew just lookin' at you, man, that you ain't no pushover. I was like "This dude means business, Rufus! Watch out!" And you totally proved me right, ya know? I'll hand it to you, you're pretty tough. But I came through in the end!"
- "So, my friend's got this sweet lowrider, right? It's pretty cool an' all, but I think if I ever bought a car, I'd go for a luxury sedan or somethin', ya know? Pleather seats, drink holders, all that classy stuff! 'Cuz I'm a classy guy, right? Anyway, I..."
- "Y'know, ever since I was a kid, I've always wondered what I'd do with super-powers. 'Course, if you think about it, do you really need 'em? Like, we ordinary folks seem to get along fine without 'em. I guess if you forgot your keys and had to break down a door..."
- "My old lady, she wants to get a cat, but I'm like "No way, babe!" I mean, those things just meow and meow all day, ya know? How you s'posed to get to sleep with all that racket? Cats are cute an' all, but I gotta be able to hear myself think! So..."
- "I finally beat you, Ken Masters! What? You're not Ken Masters? Sure you are! Just one look at that blonde hair of yours and I knew it was you. 'Course, you look a lot bigger on TV. What are you wearin'? Some kinda reverse elevator shoes or somethin'? Anyway..."
- "You sure got some ham hocks on you, lady! But it'll take more than mad cankles to defeat the mighty Rufus, though, do ya? I mean, you're fast and move all graceful an' stuff, but you've gotta have skills to get along with all that. And skills are my speciality! Ha ha!"
- "So, I was gettin' outta bed the other day an' the whole thing broke on me! You know those wooden slot thingies under the mattress? It was all like "Crack!" An' that's all she wrote! What're they made out of? Toothpicks! That's the third one I broke! Geez..."
- "Take that, Ken Masters! Huh? You say you ain't him? You can't fool me, man! I mean, you got the whole karate outfit an' gloves and crap, right? Maybe you dyed your hair or whatever, but I know it's you! 'Course, you are weaker than I woulda thought..."
- "Nothin' tastes better than a sandwich with chunky peanut butter and gobs an' gobs of grape jelly, ya know? But lately, I've been puttin' bananas in there. That's right. Bananas! Crazy, right? I could see why you'd think so, but it tastes awesome! Try it!"
- "Dude, I can hardly tell what you’re talkin’ about! You don’t sound like a fighter at all, man. What’s that? You’re a chef? That’s pretty cool, I guess. Maybe you were all like, “What should I cook for dinner an’ stuff?” and couldn’t concentrate on the fight, huh?"
- "So many dudes nowadays are all talk, no action, y'know? I mean, you can do all the fancy moves an' whatnot on the big screen, but once I get ya in the ring, you're all like, "Oh no! I'm all powerless an' stuff!" Yeah, I got your number, dude. I got ya pegged!"
- "Do you have a will all set up an' whatnot? You probably should get that taken care of, man. If not, you will have all these weird third cousins an' stuff just crawlin' outta the woodwork beggin' for scraps! That ain't no way to treat your legacy, man. Anyway..."
- "So why don't guys like you wear shoes, anyway? Like, is it some kind of rule or somethin'? Or do you just have really bad corns and shoes would make it worse? I had this corn once, man. It was the size of a freakin' jellybean! An' what if you stepped in dog doo?"
- "Did you enjoy your beating, Ken Masters? Huh? I got the wrong guy? Don't play me for a fool, man! Look at that blonde hair! How could you not be Ken Masters? You can't fool me just by changin' your hairstyle, dude! I'm no dummy, pal! I can see right through you!"
- "I hear that you sumo dudes eat nothing but sushi and stew and tofu and stuff, like, 24 hours a day, man. There's this sushi place near my house, but there's all these rumors goin' around that they serve spoiled fish! One bite, an' you'll be on the toilet all day!"
- "Now you know what it feels like to lose, Ken Masters! I bet you totally thought you could run from me, but I proved you wrong an' then some, didn't I? Oh yeah! You never thought I'd find you, but I did! And I gave it to you good! Were you even fightin' for real?"
- "I'll never forget when I first met my girl. It was a rainy day in October and I was on my way home from a fight. Suddenly, this chick came outta nowhere an' was all like "Help!" I guess she pulled a dine an' dash, so I beat up the waiter that was chasin' her!"
- "So you're Ken Masters, huh? What? You're not? Are you sure, man? You sure look like him in that outfit. I mean, you've got the gloves and all that, I guess maybe you coulda dyed your hair or something. But that's not enough to fool me, Ken! I'm on to you! You hear me?"
- "Y'know, I think the way a dude wears his hair tells you a lot about his personality, right? Like, I took forever an' a day to finally decide on my look. It's not a decision you can take lightly, man. I put a lot of thought into this. I spent years plannin' it!"
- "You could totally use a makeover, girl. What're you doin' wearin' your school uniform, anyway? Are you so poor you couldn't afford a cool ensemble like the one I'm wearin'? You won't get far in the fighting world in an outfit like that! What you need to do is..."
- "What a crazy fight. Never expected to run into a weird dude like you, man. What with that weird basketball thing stuck in your belly an' all. How do you eat, anyway? Do you just spoon stuff right into that ball? What's it like bein' a robot thing? Is it fun?"
- "So, I finally found you, Ken Masters! How does it feel to lose to me, Masters? Are you filled with regret? Rage? How about rue? I bet you're filled to the brim with rue, ain't ya? What? You're not Ken Masters? C'mon, man! It'll take more than a mask to fool me!"
- "Now that's what I like to see! You an' me, we think alike, ya know? I mean, all these skinny dudes runnin' around like they're so cool, but you an' me, we know that only wimps and losers are skinny, right? No one likes a guy that looks like a skeleton! Seriously..."
- "Phew... Man, why they gotta have these fighting tournaments out in the boonies, anyways? At this rate, I'll get so much exercise just getting there that I'll end up losing weight and end up lookin' like some kinda wimp. Ha ha! Hey! You know, I bet that jerk is behind all this. It's some kinda conspiracy! And speakin' of you-know-who, another one of his look-alikes tried to step up to me the other day. Just how low is he willin' to sink, anyways? I mean, how can they just call him the number one fighter in America!? Just thinkin' about it makes my blood boil. I'm number one around here! I've got too much class to brag like that, though. It's you, Candy. With you around, honeypants, I let my mouth run off and maybe I say too much sometimes. Oh, don't look at me like that, baby. You'll get my hands sweatin' an' I'll end up losin' control of this here bike. You're the best girl in America, toots... Nah, in the world... Screw that! You're the best in the freakin' universe! If I had to sum you up in just one word, I'd say you're superhotfansexygorgeoustastic, I would! Whaddya say we pit-stop for lunch at the next place? Come to think of it, I'm not really seein' any restaurants around here. I don't think I've seen a single friggin' building today, actually. Man, we must really be in the middle of friggin' nowhere. I mean, the gas station attendant was pretty clear, right? I mean, he said go straight till the intersection, then turn where the white dog is sittin'. Right? But the dog was just, like, takin' a catnap in the middle of the road. How was I s'pposed to know which way to go? And who ever heard of a dog that sleeps flat on its back like that, anyway? That musta been Ken Masters! He totally knew I would whip his butt in the tournament, so he tried to sabotage me! Oh, you'll rue this day, Ken Masters! RUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!"
Gas Station Attendant: Hmm... Where'd you say you pushed this thing from? I mean, geez, this is one heavy bike. I doubt I could get it a couple hundred feet myself.
Candy: Well, my Rufus ain't no ordinary man! He's the best fighter in America, ya know! And he's a gentleman! Pushin' me around is no big deal to him. Right, Rufus?
Rufus: That's right! When I get serious, I could push a bike like that around the world seven times over! 'Course, I rolled up my sleeve and fixed 'er a while back. She can go anywhere now! But, uh, just ridin' around ain't gonna give me the thrills I'm after!
Candy: Ooooh! Rufus, I just adore you!
Rufus: Vroom! Vroom! Time to hit the road, Candy! Where you wanna go?
Candy: Hmmm... Lemme see... I'm gettin' a little tired of this desert heat... Got it! Wanna check out the North Pole, baby?
Rufus: I like the way you think, pudding pants! That's the greatest idea I've ever heard!
Candy: I know, right? But I've never been to the North Pole before. You know how to get there, baby?
Rufus: C'mon, Candy. That's a no-brainer! All we gotta do is head due north. Ya can't go any further north than the North Pole, right?
Candy: Wow! You're like some kinda genius!
- "Man, I've gotten so famous lately that I can't even walk around outside anymore without people tryin' to ask for my autograph! I'm thinkin' maybe I need a bodyguard or somethin'! For real!"
- "I ain't just a legend in the fighting world, ya know. I'm also well-known in biker circles! Prolly considered the top biker in America! But I got my sights set even higher! One day, I'll..."
- "Candy's really into gardening lately. Ya know those little onion-lookin' things? They kinda look like me? Oh yeah! Bulbs! So, she planted a buncha bulbs in the garden, see? An' before long..."
- "So I was wonderin'... What's the difference between an ocean an' a sea, anyway? Is it just about size? Does the location matter? Can a sea get promoted to an ocean if it tries really hard?"
- "Wanna know what I like most about Candy? Too bad! That's top-secret privileged information, bub! I don't want you fallin' in love with her, too! Not that you could compete, but still..."
- "I drove to China on my bike the other day. What? I ain't lyin', man! I never lie! I totally drove there on my bike! Don't believe me? Check a map! I'll retrace my steps for ya!"
- "There ain't nothin' I like more than a nice custom bike. It ain't just about the obvious stuff like color and shape, either. Ya gotta worry about the overall balance an' make sure it looks..."
- "Why do women take so long to shop, anyway? Don't tell Candy I said this, but that girl took, like, 2 hours to decide between a couple of blouses that were the exact same color! No difference!"
- "Hobbies? Karaoke, baby! Can't get enough of it! One time Candy an' me, we rented out a karaoke box for a whole week! That was a blast! We're still payin' the owner for the busted speakers..."
- "Now you know the agony of defeat, Ken Masters! What? You say I got the wrong guy? Well, you do look different from that picture I saw in the paper, but you can afford plastic surgery, so..."
- "That's a pretty wild hairstyle ya got there, chief. You must go through a lot of hairspray, though. What about when you go to sleep... Do you get bed hair or something like that?"
- "I hear you say you've transcended your humanity or whatever. What's that s'posed to mean? I'm bigger than you, right? So, have I, like, transcended your transcended humanity or somethin'?"
- "When I was a kid, I used to be a rebel like you. A real jerk. Once, I even got a mohawk just to stick it to the man! Anyway, the man was a barber an' he cut it off pretty quick, but..."
- "You tryin' to run some kinda scam here, bub? You make with the whole cute baby animal routine, then start bitin' and shockin' when people come in close? I'll admit you're adorable, though."
- "Hold on there, lady! You're tellin' me all that fire an' electricity an' whatnot was from hidden gadgets? You mean to tell me that's not against the rules? Wait, seriously?"
- "Now you know the bitter sting of defeat, Ken Masters! What? You say I got the wrong person? Ha ha! No way, Masters! You just dressed as an English girl to try an' fool me! I know it!"
- "Phew! What a great fight! I mean, I totally whipped you good! Hey! Don't look at me like that, lady! It so happens that I'm spoken for! The only girl I need is Candy! Take a hike, toots!"
- "Defeat looks good on you, Ken Masters! What? You say I got the wrong guy? No way, man! I recognize the hair! What's with the outfit, though. Did you pull a dine an' dash or somethin'?"
- "How does it feel to ride the defeat train, Ken Masters? Next stop: Failureville! Population: you! What? You say I got the wrong guy? Fat chance! You're just embarrassed about losin'!"
- "The only sound I'm interested in hearin' is the sound of my bike's muffler spewin' life-giving carbon dioxide while I cruise the whole world with my best gal ridin' alongside me! Yeah!"
- "Speaking of India, I took my girl Candy to a curry restaurant the other day - one where you can pick how spicy you want it. I always get the spiciest! Candy tried it, and lemme tell ya..."
- "Don't worry about me, man. I may not look the part, but I'm a consummate gentleman! I never kick a man when he's down an' I usually remember to excuse myself after I belch! So, anyway..."
- "What the heck is a sumo wrestler doin' here, anyway? Aren't you guys only s'posed to wrestle each other in some kinda special ring or somethin'? Isn't fightin' outsiders against your code?"
- "Sorry, pal, I'm a pretty finicky eater. I only eat burgers, hot dogs, fries, pizza, onion rings, spaghetti, sandwiches, chicken, steak, pork chops, mashed potatoes, coleslaw, roast beef..."
- "Ah hah! I finally found you, Ken Maste... wait, what the heck is up with you? Your body is red hot and you got some plasma in your eyes! Are you sick or something!? Once when I was sick, I..."
- "True kung fu masters are quiet types, man. They don't go around starrin' in movies and whatnot. You gotta be more stoic and reserved like me, man. Just stare people down and stay quiet."
- "Y'know, my gramma always told me to treat my elders with respect, so I'll let you off easy. She also used to say somethin' about never eatin' vegetables. Or... Wait..."
- "Is it true that you actually died and came back from the dead? You don't look like no zombie to me, though. Dude, you're not gonna try to eat my brain, are ya? It's not very big. Honest!"
- "Now you know the taste of defeat, Ken Masters! What? I got the wrong guy? No way, pal! You're just tryin' to confuse me so you can orchestrate your escape! Well, it's too late for that!"
- "Hang on there, bub. You don't look like no ninja to me, man. Where's your scrolls an' your throwing stars, an' your mask? An' what kind of ninja wears sneakers like that? Explain yourself!"
- Dude! Duuuude! What is that? Why are you covered in oil, man? Were you about to make a big batch of popcorn an' you kinda had an accident or somethin'? I mean, when I make popcorn, I..."
- "Holy crap! A ninja! A real-life ninja! Candy! Candy, baby, come quick! Get a load of this! A real ninja! She threw ninja stars at me an' everything! Isn't this awesome! Let's get a picture!"
- "Dang, that hurt! Are you nuts? You came after me like you was really tryin' to hurt me! What would you do if I'da gotten all messed up? Does your insurance cover stuff like that or what?"
- "How does it feel to suffer a defeat at the hands of your rival, Ken Masters? Stop pretendin' you don't know who I am! Everybody knows the mighty Rufus! Seriously. Just ask around. I'm famous!"
- "Rulin' the world sounds like it would just be a huge pain in the neck to me, man. I mean, have you ever seen the world? It's freakin' huge! Seems like a lot of responsibility to shoulder."
- "How does defeat feel, Ken Masters? What? You say I got the wrong person? Gimme a break, man. I know your outfit when I see it. An' I know you don't wear shoes. It has to be you! I know it!"
- "Dude, if you keep fighting like that, you're gonna lose a ton of calories! You know how long it took to get this killer body of mine!? I had to eat 100 eggs, then 50 steaks for breakfast!"
- "I never really believed in destiny until I met my Candy. When our eyes first met, I thought I was gonna have a heart attack! Heck, maybe I did. I don't remember the details all too well."
- "How does it feel to suffer a crushing defeat, Ken Masters? What? You say I got the wrong guy? No way, man! I recognize the outfit! You say you just studied together? I ain't buyin' it!"
- "How often do you shave your head, man? Is it, like, an everyday thing or what? Does it itch when it grows back? You might wanna try some aloe or some kinda cream or whatever for that."
- "I don't get my jollies beatin' up on schoolkids, alright? This is a tournament an' I was just followin' the rules is all. What? Ryu? Nope, never heard of him. So, anyway, like I was sayin'..."
- "What's your deal, man? Askin' me to show you my moves. Why? You gonna try to copy 'em or somethin'? You don't have what it takes! My moves are custom-tailored to my body! Mine! All mine!"
- "You wanna know the secret of lookin' cool in the ring? It's all about the stance, man. I try to slump my shoulders and sorta let my body flap around. That, and I scream "Woo!" a lot."
- "Taste the bittersweet saltiness of your own defeat, Ken Masters! You say I got the wrong guy? You can't fool me, Masters! You're wearin' that mask to disguise your identity! But I'm onto ya!"
- "Hey, you ever see a panda in China? The other day Candy was saying how cute those things were, y'know? What? I do not look like a panda! What's wrong with you!? Well, anyway, Candy said..."
- "Jumpin' jehovah! You call that Kung-fu? That's what's wrong with kids nowadays! You guys act like a buncha know-it-alls on your message boards and you don't know your hi-yahs from your achoos!
- "How much time do you spend now workin' out? Like, 2 minutes in a day? Don't you watch the news? A high body fat percentage is the key to a strong immune system! Dontcha wanna be healthy like me!?"
- "I’m on a roll!"
- "The legend enters the fray."
- "My fist’ll give you amnesia!"
- "I ain't takin' no new students."
- "NOW I'm cool!"
- "I'm exhausted..."
Win Quotes (character-specific)
- "I dunno if you think being nice to dogs will make me go easy on you, Ken Masters, but I hate dogs because..."
- "Dude, your face is all wrong. You may be strong, but without the mojo to back it up you'll never be as good as me!"
- "Speaking of money, last time I went shopping, the clerk gave me back too much change... But since then, I'm so..."
- "Why do all bad guys have white eyes like that? It's like you're saying, "Hey, I'm a bad guy! Look at my white eyes!""
- "What do you eat to get that green? Vegetables? It's veggies, isn't it? I don't hate veggies, but they're no cheeseburger..."
- "Ken Masters! What do you think you're doing wearing something like that in public! Oh the inhumanity!"
- "Chinese food sure is delicious! I went with Candy to this one place... It was good, but I was hungry again 15 min..."
- "Oy, Ken Masters! Are you trying to say you could beat me with handcuffs on? What kinda weird things are you into?"
- "Being able to spit fire is pretty cool, bro! Is it because you eat spicy stuff every day? Hey, where else does fire..."
- "Say, you think I could have some roses to give to my girl, Candy? I'm totally a romantic at heart, you know..."
- "You wanna be friends with me? Sure! It's your lucky day, but does that mean we have to hang out together now?"
- "You may have changed your hairstyle, Ken Masters, but that just makes it easier for me to find you!"
- "You're no ninja! All the ninjas I see on TV are all sneaky and cunning, and they don't wear sneakers..."
- "How many meals do you eat per day? I try to get in at least 6, but it seems like you're doing more than..."
- "Hey, you're one of those, aren't you! When Candy went to Japan, she brought back pictures of these..."
- "Whoa, you just came outta nowhere! Are you one of my fans? If you want an autograph, you have to stand in line..."
- "Today has finally come, Ken Masters! You made fun of me, and now you reap what you sown!"
- "Hmm? Did you fall for my dashing good looks? Sorry to disappoint, but Candy's the only girl for me!"
- "The military seems like it's pretty tough! If everyone wakes up at the same time, who gets to go to the bathroom first..."
- "Wow, you are a handsome devil! I'm still the best-looking guy around, of course, but you're no slouch..."
- "You may have dyed your hair and changed clothes, but I know it's you, Ken Masters! Your moves are the same..."
- "Nothing says mojo like a cool eyepatch! It's like, I only need one eye to beat you! Where can I get one of those?"
- "I don't like bullying little kids! Not like yours truly was ever bullied, of course. With my charisma, I owned the playground..."
- "Trying to hide from me by using a mask, Ken Masters? I didn't know you were into such weird hobbies..."
- "This is just what I heard, but if your body fat percentage is too low, you'll sink when you try to swim..."
- "You're not a regular human being! Ordinary folks don't just throw their head around like that! At least not that..."
- "Hey, I heard that in Osaka, people like to eat until they pass out! Is that true? I wanna go to Osaka..."
- "Aha, Ken Masters! So you're finally trying to be more like me, eh? Try all you like, I'm an original, baby!"
- "Wanting to fight against me shows you have good sense. Everyone wants a piece of the champion!"
- "Eddy? My name isn't Eddy, it's Rufus. And sorry, I can't be your boyfriend, I already got a girl. No offense..."
- "You're not half bad! Nothing compared to me, but that goes without saying! Still, though, not bad, old man..."
- "Lately, all the young punks are all talk and no action! If you wanna stand out like me, you gotta have soul!"
- "You got big, and your skin's pretty hard, Ken Masters... What, is this robot Ken Masters? 'Cause I can fight..."
- "I saw you on TV! Damn you, trying to be all cool! You may have the snazzy threads, but I've got the charisma!
- "I dig nature too! I'm always on the lookout for new scenic places to take my babe!"
- "You can shoot lasers? Are you a robot? You do have that red eye and all... I knew it, you're a robot!"
- "Hide behind all the masks you want, Ken Masters, but I can spot you from a mile away!"
- "Speaking of bears, I saw a polar bear when I went to the North Pole! I didn't get to see Santa Claus, but..."
- "You're one of those cosplayer guys, aren't you! I saw it on TV once! If you're gonna dress up as someone..."
- "You own a Chinese restaurant? Is it that one with the really spicy food? I like spicy, but it sure does give me..."
- "They say you're supposed to wait 3 minutes before eating cup ramen, but I just dive right in! Who needs common sense?"
- "I dunno why you're talking so funny, Ken Masters, but did you think I wouldn't recognize you if you dressed up?"
- "You need more than just size! You gotta have a certain something... Charisma, man! Gotta put on the moves..."
- "I KNEW it! I knew you were into cross-dressing, Ken Masters! It just pisses me off that you make for a cute girl!"
- "You're pretty intense! Not quite on my level, though, but you do have that certain something..."
- "Hahaha, Ken Masters! Aiming for best in the universe? That title already belongs to me!"
- "Is this some kind of movie? Are we on set? If it's a movie, yours truly should be the star!"
- "So, Ken Masters, you are trying to match my charisma with a brand-new face? You'll never be half the man I am!"
- "So you have a pet panda? I've been thinking about getting a pet myself. You know Candy loves animals..."
- "Whoa... Is that a real sword?! You were trying to cut me, weren't you! Man, that's dangerous!"
- "Being able to make your own electricity means your electric bill at home must be pretty cheap!"
- "A talking cat… Speaking of talking animals, just yesterday, Candy and I were at the pet store, and…"
- "I like your style, man! Where’d you get those clothes? Were they a special order? Do you think they have bigger sleaves?"
- "Hey, aren’t you famous or something? I’ve seen you before!"
- "Do cats really eat raw fish? I guess you have no way to cook it, but raw is kinda grimey… Grilled taste better…"
- "Serves you right Ken Masters! It takes more than a mask to fool ol' Rufus. Come to think of it, you are sure quiet today...Cat got your tongue? Are you overcome with grief at your loss? Ha!"
- "If this was a dance contest, you shoulda told me before we got started! I've got the perfect costume for it! The only thing I like more than dancing is my beautiful Candy! In fact, once I..."
- "Now I'm what some would consider, uhh... Full-bodied? Big boned? But you, my friend, you take the German Chocolate cake! Was your mother a giant, too? Or did you have some kinda growth spurt?"
- "Serves you right, Ken Masters! You thought a bottle of cheap hair dye and a pair of high heels would be enough to fool me? Not on your life! I'll admit your abs do look good in that outfit."
- "You expect me to join an army? And get up at the buttcrack of dawn everyday? And shovel down that swill you have the nerve to call food? Not a chance, buster! Why on earth would you...